For so long in my life I thought freedom was something to be earned, something to be given, something to wage war to have. But in living the chapters of the stories of my life I now realize that freedom as I knew it was simply an illusion; an illusion that kept me in shackles. I was always out to prove myself, my worthiness, my divineness, my motherness. The joke was on me. I never had to prove, live up to, or earn anything for freedom.
Freedom has been mine all along.
In simplifying my life…in living in the place of receiving my dreams, in choosing to nurture me before I gave to anyone else, in loving myself just as I am, in letting go of people that choose to see me as less than my DIVINE self, in choosing a life that radiates authenticity…THAT is my FREEDOM.
I explain myself to no one. Not even myself. Not my parents, not my best friends, not my children, not my enemies. I live from my authentic space of Self. I trust me in my ever evolving state. I forgive myself for mistakes I have made, filter them through whatever filter is necessary, integrate what is needed and let the rest go. Does this make me perfect? NO. It makes me human and also in the same breath DIVINE.
I choose authenticity before anything else. If I can’t live from a place that is authentic what is the point. I AM who I AM. No more, no less. I still say fuck, I still have my days where I weep in a puddle on the floor, I still have moments of doubt and I still do a lot that violates my own personal boundaries. I share my words as a witness to my life. I process much of my life through connection with the Divine Source through words, through dance, through prayer, through meditation, through connection, through yoga.
My life has no guarantee of happiness. It is most definitely not guaranteed to always be easy. I AM the faith and trust in myself and the Universe flows as it is needed and I AM here for a reason…to be ME. I choose to celebrate my worthiness, my Divineness, my wholeness…even when from the outside eye and when my five senses scream something different. If my THIRD EYE, my personal DIVINE knowing intuition tells me all is well…then I TRUST that. I continue to do the shadow work. I continue to look at the hurts and the pains and learn from them.
In all authentic knowing…
I AM FREE.